Take the Stress Out of Stress By Susan Leigh

How would it be if you awoke every day feeling refreshed and confident about the day ahead, with enough energy and resilience in reserve to tackle whatever might be thrown your way? Yes, unexpected challenges crop up from time to time but how would it be, if in the main, you knew yourself well enough to be able to manage stress, cope well and have some time for yourself, including breaks for those important people and things in your life?

In a busy life we often focus on work, letting home, friends and outside interests take care of themselves. But often personal areas will stay quiet, gently fading into the background, not wanting to force us to choose or add to our stress. At some point the realisation hits us. Friends and family don't include us anymore. They are living their lives without us. It may take a while for us to notice, but it's not an uncommon situation.

Some stress is good for us. It keeps us on our toes, helps us think outside the box, come up with new ideas, deliver more than we thought we could. But continual stress is counter-productive and can cause many issues and ailments over time. There are a documented 360 physical symptoms of stress and you may be working your way through them all!

At first the occasional symptom may go unnoticed or be explained away. The intermittent headaches, sleepless nights, irritability, disappearing sense of humour, poor concentration can be explained away through being busy and overloaded. You may have a stressful period at work, problems at home, health-related concerns, things on your mind.

But if they continue unabated or start to escalate it may be time to address what's going on, what the root cause or trigger is to these changes in your equilibrium. Ignored, things often continue until you can't discount or brush them aside any more. The continual drips can escalate into an overflow which starts to impact and affect every area of your life.

Starting to take responsibility and own how you're feeling, the way you're living your life is an important first step to manage stress. When we acknowledge our responses, recognise that we need to take control and then start to do so we become more able to move to a better place both mentally and physically.

Here are some steps to take the stress out of stress;

Does dealing with stress mean compartmentalising it, leaving it at the door, or is it more effective to find positive ways to manage your life so that every area has balance as often as possible?

- Recognise what's going on with you. What is your inner voice saying; that you must do it all yourself or feel guilty, a failure, less successful? Do you fear being 'caught out', found to be an imposter if others step in to help? Recognise the triggers, the situations or phrases people use that influence your stress levels.

- Revise your perspective. Notice the difference in your outlook from when you're feeling happy and upbeat, or conversely battered and fed up. It's often not what happens to us but how we're feeling and responding that's the determining factor. Take control and focus on what your viable choices are. Appreciate what you have already in your life.

- Be kind to yourself by being healthy, with regular good food, water, exercise. Take time to read a book or even do nothing. Simply parking the car for a 15 minutes break after work can really benefit your mood and stress levels for when you return home.

- Manage the overwhelm by delegating, sharing and regularly communicating what's going on. Ask for help, don't expect others to be psychic. And when you bring others in to help they may thrive with the additional responsibility, seeing it as a chance to grow, improve their skills and perhaps even impress you with new ideas and better ways of doing things.

- 'No' can be most positive word in your vocabulary. Teach others to respect you, to understand what you do every day and value how much you do for them. Encourage their gratitude and appreciation.

- 'Yes' can be negative if it's become your constant default to everything that's asked of you. Do you agree out of fear, apprehension, guilt? Used positively 'yes' can move you out of your comfort zone and scare you a little every day.

- Break big tasks into bite-sized chunks so that you're the decision-maker, moving and feeling proactive.

Why not manage stress by selecting 3 of these items to action in the next 48 hours;

1. Outsource tasks that are not in your area of expertise. Hiring someone to manage your accounts, PR, advertising could be money well spent and free you to focus on your main business. Maybe hire someone to do your domestic chores, your cleaning, ironing, gardening and use that free time to do something for yourself.

2. Share with family. Your partner often wants to be there for you. Discuss what you're going through and let them be supportive. Even children can have tasks that are their responsibility, maybe setting the table or loading the dishwasher. Communicate and ask for help.

3. Ensure you have family time by sitting and eating together, even if it's just once a week. Keep two-way channels of communication open so it's not all about you. Be interested in what's going on in their lives and remember what you've been told so you can follow-up again.

4. Turn off technology at a set time in the evenings, unless there's an occasional emergency that needs your attention. Allow yourself to switch off, preferably for a couple of hours before bed. If you commit to specific time slots each day to go online you'll avoid wasting time by constantly checking. You'll have more free time and be able to invest genuine attention in your real relationships.

5. Treat sleep as important. Stress and sleep-related issues cost UK businesses £40 billion last year, or the equivalent of 200,000 days lost productivity, due to accidents, absenteeism and poor performance. Prepare to sleep well by winding down for an hour or two before bed. Avoid that heavy conversation last thing at night, plan for the next day by making a list of impending tasks, maybe have your clothes ready, the children's lunches packed.

6. Try to maintain a regular routine, a relaxing bath or shower to wash away the day's cares. If you have a busy physical job try to introduce balance with mentally challenging interests like quizzes, puzzles, interesting conversations, or mentally demanding work might be balanced by scheduling physical activity like the gym or a walk.

7. It can be fun to regularly get outside and maybe share that time with family by taking a walk, game of football, playing together.

8. Reward each stage of your journey with treats, me time and self-praise. Trying deserves recognition, even if things don't work out how you'd hoped.

9. Commit to ongoing training, learning, developing, improvement. Keep your brain active so that you're engaged and stimulated.

Stress is a fact of everyday life, but by incorporating a few basic steps you can implement effective ways to take the stress out of stress!

Susan Leigh, counsellor, hypnotherapist, relationship counsellor, writer & media contributor offers help with relationship issues, stress management, assertiveness and confidence. She works with individual clients, couples and provides corporate workshops and support.

She's author of 3 books, 'Dealing with Stress, Managing its Impact', '101 Days of Inspiration #tipoftheday' and 'Dealing with Death, Coping with the Pain', all on Amazon & with easy to read sections, tips and ideas to help you feel more positive about your life.

To order a copy or for more information, help and free articles visit http://www.lifestyletherapy.net

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/10103178 Take The Stress Out Of Stress By Susan Leigh

Out Of Your Head And Into Your Soul

“The best way to capture moments is to pay attention. This is how we cultivate mindfulness. Mindfulness means being awake. It means knowing what you are doing.” –Jon Kabat-Zinn

. . .

Do you fear that you’re missing out on life?

Are you waiting for something? To be loved? To be successful? To be happy?

Do you often feel like life is simply carrying you along, as something beyond your control?

In ancient Greek mythology, Narcissus was a beautiful youth who caught sight of his reflection in a pond one day and became completely enamored with it. It is said that he lay down by the water to gaze at his face, growing obsessed with his own image. Since he was unable to obtain the object of his desire, he died where he lay, overcome by grief. Sounds pathetic, but in many instances it’s a frighteningly accurate metaphor. The term “narcissist” is derived from this myth, and it tellingly refers to a person who is self-enamored and self-preoccupied, often to an obsessive and dangerous degree.

In his novella The Beast in the Jungle, author Henry James introduces us to exactly such a character: John Marcher, an extremely self-centered young man who is convinced that he has been selected by fate for a special event that will occur in his lifetime. He encounters a sensitive and intelligent young woman, May Bartram, who listens to John’s theory concerning his personal foreboding and conviction that he’s destined for greatness. May offers her friendship and agrees to watch and wait with John until this special fate comes to fruition. For many years, John sits idly and refuses to let May get close to him, ignoring the love of a good woman and killing time as he waits for his “spectacular fate”.

The story unravels to become a tale of lost life and lost love; it is only after May dies that John realizes that he’s missed most of his life—and the opportunity for true love—while waiting for a rare, strange, and self-concocted “event” that never happens. By living in his head and focusing on a fantasy, he missed the true meaning of life. He missed out on friendship, love, purpose, adventure, discovery, and self-growth. Gambling for nothing, he lost everything.

Narcissists typically do not empathize nor can they appreciate the beauty of the life that surrounds them. They exist at the opposite end of the spectrum as opposed to mindfulness. John “woke up” when May died; this was the emotional event that triggered his realization—too late—that life extended beyond himself.

Mindfulness is about exactly that: waking up to the world and connecting with life.

. . .

“By breaking down our sense of self-importance, all we lose is a parasite that has long infected our minds. What we gain in return is freedom, openness of mind, spontaneity, simplicity, altruism: all qualities inherent in happiness.” –Mathieu Ricard

. . .

As a teacher of mindfulness meditation and the founder of the University of Massachusetts’s Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Program, Jon Kabat-Zinn says:

“Mindfulness means paying attention in a particular way; on purpose, in the present moment, and non Out Of Your Head And Into Your Souljudgmentally.”

By cultivating conscious awareness of the present moment, we extract ourselves from our own toxic thought patterns. By learning to sense and see and appreciate life, we need not regret an unfulfilled existence. Mindfulness is a practice that can immediately ground us back into the world, helping us delve within ourselves while simultaneously shifting us beyond ourselves.

As mindfulness is all about “living in the now”, the idea suitably circles back to the NOW philosophy:

• Notice.

Look around you and experience the life and love that surrounds you. It is right beside you! If you haven’t seen it, open your eyes and your mind. It’s easy to remove those mental blinders and barriers, as long as you truly want to.

• Opportunities.

Seek out and you shall find opportunities to grow and connect with life without judging yourself. By staying in the moment with those who are nearest and dearest to us, we can cultivate compassion, love, kindness, and morality within us—and then extend this compassionate attitude towards others.

• Within.

By becoming more mindful, you will achieve a stronger inner peace. It is foremost beneficial to you, and then—from you—it explodes tenfold out into the world around you. You can be deeply affected by the people around you, and can gain insight from and power over their thoughts; never forget that this is mutual—so work to make a positive impact.

. . .

“Mindfulness is simply being aware of what is happening right now without wishing it were different; enjoying the pleasant without holding on when it changes (which it will); being with the unpleasant without fearing it will always be this way (which it won’t).” –James Baraz

. . .

Not sure where to start? Dr. Kabat-Zinn lists the following simple exercises as key components to mastering mindfulness:

• Pay attention to your breathing in the present moment.
• Notice what you’re sensing right now—use all of your senses. What can you see, hear, smell, touch, and taste? Increase your awareness of your body’s physical sensations to better ground yourself in the moment.
• Understand that your thoughts and emotions are like clouds. They will come and go and will always pass through; they need not define you.
• Keep a look-out for negative thought patterns so that you recognize them and then can make changes.

Get out of your head and get into your soul. Don’t waste life—live it. And begin living it now. If you do it now, you will always have time.

. . .

“In this moment, there is plenty of time. In this moment, you are precisely as you should be. In this moment, there is infinite possibility.” –Victoria Moran

A Success Formula in 10 Easy Steps

A Success Formula in 10 Easy Steps

"Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts." —Winston Churchill We are the consequence of our past and at the same time the cause of our future. This means that right now we are creating our future with our every thought and with our every action. Let's see how. We all accomplish goals in our personal life, in school and on the job. So I have a question for you: "Whose goals are you accomplishing?" Are these really your goals or are they imposed upon you? For, how do we explain that 2% of the population has 90% of the wealth in the world? This is a well-known fact. Another question comes to mind: are you among the 2%? Set your own goals and act to accomplish them or someone else will hire you to accomplish theirs! Be the part of the 2%! What is Your Goal? It doesn't matter where we are coming from. The only thing that matters is where we are going. Do you know where you are going? Do you really, exactly know your way? If you do, I encourage you to proceed! But, if you don't, I must ask you: "What is your goal?" That is a crucial step most people don't take time to consider. Truth is, the answer is in you. Maybe your mind doesn't realize it yet. But your heart does - and you can discover the answer when you are in the Alfa state of mind, which happens during meditation, for example. Only connecting to your inner self can lead you to your true self and help you get an honest, ego-less answer to the question: "What is my goal?" When you manage to "find it out", set is as your priority, make an action plan, decide to accomplish it and do it! Decision Comes First. Decision is just the first step, but actions are every step after that first one. Do you know the story about the three frogs that are standing beside a lake and then one frog decides to jump in? How many frogs are now beside the lake? Three. For one frog decided to jump, but it never did! Don't be that frog. The Missing Key Without Which all Else Crumbles. You can learn verified practical techniques for bettering your own mind, or emotional development techniques, and then techniques to further your intellectual skills; you can even find management tools, problem-solving tools, etc. The Internet is full of instructors. Books about self-development are all around us. But why do many of them not work? Because the most important thing is missing: Until it is explicitly clear exactly where we should apply these techniques and how they will help, how can we know we are on the right track and that the techniques won't just hurt us? Why you aren't satisfied. But first answer this: Have you set your own goals? And if you did, what are you doing to accomplish them? If you want to be successful and satisfied, then the first thing that you must do is to set your goals. Here are 10 points to help you realize whether the goals you've set are the right for you. Success Formula You are the only one who knows what is best for yourself. Find it IN you. Create your own peace and find out what your desires are. Make a connection with your inner self. Transform your desires to goals. Find out what your main goal is! Set your own main goal. Create an action plan, set time limit and do it! Reach it! Live it! Excellence exists in you. Be the excellence. Sense your feelings and listen to them. Do whatever it takes to feel good. Stick to it. Act. Do it! If you fail, do it again and again. Try and try again. No one has succeeded doing something big in their first attempt.

Catherine B. Roy is an author and Founder of "Live from Your Heart and Mind" (LHM) community, Awarded Top 30 Under 30 Young Leaders in the World, Member of MENSA and The Wellness Universe, Award Winning Artist and Scientist, Poet, Philosopher and Published Author whose stimulating, upbeat and inspirational writings have helped countless people in the world. https://www.catherinebroy.com Article Source: http://www.articlebiz.com/article/1051635629-1-a-success-formula-in-10-easy-steps/

31 Tips to Boost Your Mental Health

31 Tips to Boost Your Mental Health

Your mental wellbeing, positiveness and mental health are all in your hand. No one else can control it! Most of you don’t know how to take charge of your wellness while others fail to follow what they are supposed to do. You may also seek professional support or treatment to win over your psychological well-being however there are a few things that you can try on your own. In the next 10 minutes, this article will guide you through ways to improve your mental health.

1. Believe That You Are Positive –

The way you think about yourself always puts a powerful impact on how you feel. You should always practice the use of self-worth and personal power words to promote your feelings.

2. Focus on One Task at a Moment –

Don’t let your mind wander on negative emotions. Multitasking is a good practice but thinking in multiple directions at a time will lead you nowhere.

3. Exercise Your Mind & Soul –

Meditation and Yoga is a good exercise to keep your mind calm and focused on one task at a time. Physical exercise also stresses your body and releases anxiety.

4. Eat a Good Meal –

I always decorate my plate with my favorite healthy food before having my meal. I guess it gives you a rich feeling and brings positiveness and satisfaction.

5. Open your heart Out –

Everyone has a friend or relative where one can open his heart out. Trust someone who can lend an ear to your positive or negative thoughts and suggest wisely.

6. Give a Helping Hand –

Help a person in need and you will get a heavenly feeling. His smile or blessings will make your day full of gratitude and confident feeling.

7. Give a Break to Self –

Whenever it all seems like too much to handle, step away, and involve yourself in something that pleases you. Move your eyes, take a deep breath or close your eyes for 10 minutes and you will feel better.

8. Follow Your Routine –

Set rules and try to stick to them. Follow them positively as much as you can. If needed, make amendments and again start following the new ones. RULES are NOT meant to be BROKEN!

9. Sleep on Time –

One should always take at least eight hours of sleep until it is not dead urgent to spend those extra hours. A sound sleep will keep you energized for the long run as this is one of the ways to improve your mental health.

10. Value Yourself –

You are a gem for someone, the life of your loved ones, someone is always waiting for you. Value yourself and avoid self-criticism, respect and surround yourself with loved ones.

11. Healthy Breath Health Mind –

Try to be close to nature as a health and oxygen-rich breath will give you positiveness. Avoid cigarettes and drink plenty of water to stay calm and happy.

12. Retreat Yourself –

For every accomplishment, every success or every moment of happiness, give yourself a treat. Gift yourself small or big things whenever it is possible. It will motivate you!

13. Learn How to Cope with Stress –

Practice good stress-busting skills. Some get relief by playing with pets, playing with dart, stress ball, take a walk, reading, shower, pumped-up music. What’s yours?

14. Set Realistic Goals –

Be justified while settings goals for self. Your academic, professional and personal expectations and capabilities may vary. Aim high but with a realistic approach to tasting the sense of accomplishment or fate.

15. Practice Routine Things Differently –

A disciplined, timebound and challenging routine is important to accomplish something however you can always do things differently. You just need to learn the art to spice up your daily tasks with different flavors and ways to improve your mental health.

16. Seek Help Whenever Needed –

It doesn’t mean that you are incompetent. Everybody is in need of help some or other times. It's not a weakness but a helping hand can double your strength and improve your mental health.

17. Diary Writing –

There are people who practice diary writing to list out their life’s good or bad events. This may include reactions to things, ambitions, or appreciations that gives you a smile.

18. Repeat Happiness –

Do things that make you happy. Repeatedly schedule activities that keep you calm and spread happiness within self and others. Stress can’t cure problems, but repeated moments of happiness can fade your stress out.

19. Eliminate the Bad in You –

Enjoying cigarettes, alcohol or any drug may give you short-term pleasure however will seriously damage your overall well-being in a longer run. Do whatever it takes to quit it as soon as possible.

20. Volunteer Yourself –

Volunteering your time to society or for a good cause will boost up your self-esteem and will give you a feel-good factor. You will feel confident when your deeds are appreciated.

21. Expose Yourself to Sunlight –

Taking a good sunbath (not between 10:00 AM to 4:00 PM) will keep your energy level up and help you to stay close to nature while emerging positiveness and boost your mental health.

22. Do It Now –

We tend to dwell with a habit of ‘Will Do It’ or procrastinate things that we are supposed to do. Try to inculcate the ‘Do It Now’ approach within self and you will excel success.

23. Challenge Your Memory –

Try to remember things, dates, names, numbers by heart not just by writing them somewhere. Learn new things and memorize them to challenge your brain.

24. Take a New Hobby –

If you feel that your life is not exciting or you feel monotonous, add a new hobby to your routine and it will boost up your energy level and fun factor to your boredom.

25. Go for Routine Checkups –

We never know what’s happening within our body. Even if you feel strong, energetic and healthy, go for routine checkups. A positive body checkup report will boost your mental health.

26. Refrain from Social Fever –

Spend more time with your loved ones instead of spending time on social media. Avoid yourself being addicted to phone, laptop or TV rather play games or quizzes with your dear ones. This is one of the best ways to boost your mental health.

27. Worry Less & Move On –

You must have experienced that worrying more won’t change anything. If you have a solution, just do it else move on. Worrying on something that can’t be changed or undone needs to be avoided as said by the Psychotherapists.

28. Start Your Day with What You Love the Most –

I love to pump up my morning with bombastic music. I feel energetic and plan my day with passion and ensure that my goals for the day are met before I go to bed.

29. Learn to Say NO –

It is not advisable to take every burden on yourself. One should not over commit and underachieve. Only make commitments what you can do within the stipulated time. Say NO to tasks that are out of your reach or capabilities. There is no harm in saying NO!

30. Find a Purpose of Your Life –

Set short term goals followed by long term goals. When your short-term goals are met, you will feel confident to achieve long-term goals. Every short success will boost your mental health and encourage you to meet your long-term goals in life.

31. Never Hesitate to Try Something –

I know that failure tastes bitter, but it is still far better than not trying. Challenge your capabilities and try new things, take new tasks because even if you fail, you will end up learning new things.

If you try these ways to improve your mental health, you will surely move towards a blissful life and always feel confident and energetic. Every step will boost your mental health and will keep you calm and happy throughout your life. Keep Trying, Stay Happy and Blessed!